Recently, my dishwasher broke, which is a pain for three reasons. The first being I had to hand wash dishes (shudder.) Secondly, apparently, integrated dishwashers are hard to fix and it’d be cheaper to buy a new one (sorry planet.) Lastly, I’d have to research and buy a new dishwasher.
Reader, I’ll say it. I don’t know a lot about dishwashers. To be honest, I’d be shocked to find out that anyone knows anything about them. Other than the fact they’re convenient, I have very little idea of what I’m looking for.
My criteria for a successful purchase are clean dishes, and a price that will allow me to continue to occasionally go out to eat, giving my reasonably priced dishwasher a break. In marketing speak, I’m a primed and impressionable buyer.
I bought a Beko DIN15R20 Fully Integrated Standard Dishwasher. It has a silver control panel with a fixed door fixing kit thrown in for good measure. Yeah, you know the one now! The process was a headache from start to finish. Partly because the world seems to be a bin fire right now – but also because of bad copywriting.
Why? I’m so glad you asked (spoiler alert, it’s a long and boring story – but you’ve made it this far!)
Here are all the steps I took buying my dishwasher (and all of the bad UX copy that got in the way.)
- I called the appliance repairman who had the best ratings on Google. He had a website which made me think he could probably fix a dishwasher. The only problem was when we spoke on the phone – he let me know that he doesn’t fix dishwashers, despite the copy on his website.
- I searched the make of my current dishwasher to find out how much it would cost me to repair.
- I learned that dishwashers have very long, very complex names.
- I wondered to myself if this was necessary – the marketer in me wanted them to have user friendly names but perhaps that was just my neuroses.
- I saw the dishwasher I wanted was in stock at Curry’s – I decided to go there in person as they were in stock locally (the website said so.)
- Learned they couldn’t deliver until way into the new year and they’re more expensive than other online retailers.
- I also learned that lots of people buy new dishwashers (out of choice) at this time of year?
- I headed home and searched for more dishwashers. I was pretty bored of learning about dishwashers by now…
- I saw a chic, black, freestanding dishwasher in my budget on ao.com.
- I began to think I could live with having the dishwasher on show if it meant I could fix it more easily when it broke again.
- I read the features of the dishwasher – it seemed great.
- I decided it would probably do and I could have it before Christmas.
- I bought the dishwasher and read the delivery Ts & Cs.
- I decided to go for the ‘premium disconnection and recycling’ option.
- I explained to my Mum (just to make sure) that this seemed like a good idea. The dishwasher seemed great and the company would take away my old one and recycle it as per the info on the website.
- I hand washed all of my dishes for a week.
- My partner rewashed all of the dishes I washed for a week.
- On delivery day, I welcomed two dishwasher experts into my house who began to look very confused.
- I learned that you can’t easily swap an integrated dishwasher for a freestanding dishwasher.
- I learned that you can, but the guys weren’t insured to do so.
- I felt like a massive idiot.
- I learned that this happens all the time, especially with fridges and washing machines (and every appliance that has a built in and freestanding option.)
- I learned that the dishwasher guys were sick of this happening.
- I promised the guys I wasn’t trying to be cheap or save money by getting them to complete a more complex job by booking them to do a quick switcheroo.
- They believed me and once again assured me that it happens all the time.
- My new dishwasher stayed in the van while I called customer services to swap my freestanding dishwasher for another integrated one.
- I said, ‘I’d like the BEKO DIN15R20 please’ and felt like an idiot because it’s a silly name for a dishwasher.
- The customer service said they couldn’t find the BEKO DIN15R20 and asked me if I meant the BEKO DIN15322, or maybe the BEKO DIN16430, or perhaps even the BEKO DIN590420D?
- I repeated that I’d like the BEKO DIN15R20.
- I began to consider making my life’s work remarketing dishwashers.
- The customer service rep finally found the BEKO DIN15R20.
- I apologised again, and explained that perhaps they should have a section on their website that flashes, screams and states; ‘are you changing from an integrated to a freestanding appliance?’
- I paid an extra £60 for my trouble.
- The customer service agent apologised and assured me the new dishwasher would fit and be installed without a hitch.
- I bored everyone with the story about how a simple paragraph of copy, flashing banner or pop up could have avoided this whole problem.
You get the picture.
I’ll admit that I’m biassed – but there are not many things in life that can’t be made better with clear copywriting. When it comes to websites especially, you have to think of the user experience – and accommodate for stupidity. Like people who think you can swap an integrated for a freestanding dishwasher.
Love talking copy? Are you in charge of naming dishwasher models? Hit us up and we’ll write copy that won’t confuse your customers.